By Amy Grabowski,
MA, LCPC
For
The Awakening Center’s #awakentoaction, we are celebrating LGBTQ Pride this
month!
I
was thinking back to the mid 1980s when I took a graduate school course
“Abnormal Psychology.” The way the professor taught the course makes it my
favorite class, to this day! As we worked our way thru all the various mental
illness diagnoses, she taught us that every diagnosis was on a continuum, and
we (the students in her class) were on the same continuum too. She wanted to
eliminate “them” versus “us” mentality. Rather than “Those people who have
Schizophrenia” we could feel empathy for our clients whose symptoms were more
profound than what we ourselves experienced.
One
day, the professor stopped the class and said, “I am supposed to teach you that
homosexuality is a mental illness, but I refuse to do so!” She gave us an
assignment. For the following week, we were supposed to pretend that we were
gay and we had to hide this from everyone we knew. Some of us who were married,
and since same sex marriage was not legal way back in 1984, we had to pretend
that we were not allowed to marry our current partners. We were not allowed to
hold our partner’s hand in public for fear of getting harassed or arrested. We
were to remove pictures of our partners from our workplace, for fear of getting
fired! We had to hide who we lived with for fear that we would be evicted from
apartments or would not be allowed to purchase a house with our partner.
The
next week, the class discussed what it was like to hide something fundamental about
who you were deep inside. The reactions ranged from humiliation and shame, to
rage and indignation. This experience has stayed with me to this day. And I was
relieved that soon afterward homosexuality was removed from the Diagnostic and
Statistical Manual.
If
we zoom to the current decade, many changes are in place. In many states (but
not all), tt is no longer legal to discriminate against a person because of
their sexual orientation in housing or employment. LGB individuals can now join
the US military. It is legal for same sex couples to marry. Gay pride flags and
banners wave in stores and windows throughout our city. The Gay Pride Parade just
took place here in Chicago and has become a big summer event.
However
this is not enough. We need to continue to move forward with progress in our
society to the point that every person, no matter their sexual orientation or
gender identity, is treated with respect, worth, and dignity. Every person
should be able to live their life without constant vigilance for harassment and
persecution. Every religion of the world has a version of the Golden Rule: “Do
unto others as you would have them do unto you”; and I would love to see every
person of every religion, or of no religion at all, live by this rule.
So
how can we help make this change happen?
It starts with ourselves. Those of us outside the LGBTQ community can
become allies. A true ally actively combats anti-LGBT bullying and
harassment while uplifting the voices of LGBT people. Allyship is more than
broadly supporting LGBT people; it's an active, ongoing process of advocating
for LGBT individuals (and other marginalized groups) without speaking for them
or over them. (https://www.glsen.org/participate/programs/ally-week?gclid=CNW79eG90tQCFQ6taQod408Jiw
)
Just
as it takes courage for LGBT people to be open and honest about who they are,
it also takes courage to support your LGBT friends or loved ones. We live in a
society where prejudice still exists and where discrimination is still far too
common. Recognizing these facts and giving your support to that person will
take your relationship to a higher level and is a small step toward a better
and more accepting world. (http://www.hrc.org/blog/how-to-be-an-lgbt-ally
)
- Be a listener.
- Be open-minded.
- Be willing to talk.
- Be inclusive and invite LGBT friends to hang out with
your friends and family.
- Don't assume that all your friends and co-workers are
straight. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their
coming-out process. Not making assumptions will give them the space they
need.
- Anti-LGBT comments and jokes are harmful. Let your
friends, family and co-workers know that you find them offensive.
- Confront your own prejudices and bias, even if it is
uncomfortable to do so.
- Defend your LGBT friends against discrimination.
- Believe that all people, regardless of gender identity
and sexual orientation, should be treated with dignity and respect.
- If you see LGBT people being misrepresented in the
media, contact us at www.glaad.org
It
starts with me. And you! And if we tell two people, and they tell two people,
and they tell two people, and so on and so on and so on…. Hopefully, we can help
change the world to be a much more loving and accepting place for all!
Namastè,
Amy is proud to be
a LGBTQ Ally!
Posts
Great post Amy!
ReplyDeleteThis is so helpful!
ReplyDelete