Asking for Help

Asking for Help

Cara Chill

  I have recently taken notice in my life that asking for help seems to have a negative connotation.  Ever since I can remember, if I did not understand something, I would ask for assistance.  However, in adulthood, I am noticing a lot of individuals who see this as a sign of weakness or incompetence.  When did we start to say that it is not acceptable to ask for help? Many of us would admit to going above and beyond when it comes to helping our friends and family but when it is us who needs help, we have a tendency to refuse it.  Understandably, it is not the most comfortable experience to admit that you may be struggling.  However, if you do not seek help, how are you supposed to receive it? I have been ruminating over this topic for a while now and simply cannot grasp it.  I have finally come to the conclusion that you have to accept that you cannot do everything yourself 100% of the time and there is nothing wrong with that! Even the best and the brightest have had trouble at one point or another.  There are many people throughout history who have struggled and ended up succeeding in the end.  Bill Gates dropped out of Harvard, Thomas Edison had 1,000 unsuccessful attempts before creating the first light bulb, and Oprah Winfrey was fired when she was once a television reporter.  What I am trying to demonstrate is, everyone has flops in life but it is up to you to turn that flop into something useful.  I try to make every negative experience into something I can learn from.  Learning is a process that we go through our entire lives and along the way, we may ask for help.  Asking for help should not be a negative reflection of someone’s intelligence or ability.  It should demonstrate their strength and courage for seeking the opportunity to learn and better themselves. Teaching, learning, and helping others, is a part of life, and appreciating those times in life where we can learn something new or teach something to someone makes life a bit more exciting.  I will leave you all with a quote that may be a tad bit cliché but fitting for my thoughts. “Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for the rest of his life.” Chinese Proverb

Focus on Today

Focus on Today

Cara Chill

In an effort to maintain a healthy lifestyle and accomplish a personal goal of mine, I have decided to start training for my first 5k.  Working out and going for walks or jogs has always been a great way for me to cope with stress while having a moment to myself.  I have always wanted to take jogging to the next level and run a 5k but have never had the courage to register.  The fear of coming in last was always something that deterred me from pursuing this dream of mine.  However, several weeks ago, I had a realization that encouraged me to register.  Something inside me believed that I was capable of running a 5k. It took me a very long time to relinquish my anxiety and my “what if” thinking, but now; I am focusing on the present, and understand that worrying about something in the future will not help me in the present. I then began browsing the internet and came across a quote that I found most fitting to my situation. “Worrying does not empty tomorrow if its troubles, it empties today of its strengths,” Corrie Ten Boom. I have always been the type of person who worries about things in the distance instead of focusing on the here and now.  As difficult as it was to change this type of thinking, I feel a lot more confident in my abilities when I maintain focused on the present. What I can do is try to focus on the present and try to not worry about things that are out of my control.  In order for me to be successful at my first 5k, I can practice, eat right, and sleep well.  This way of thinking can be taken into many different contexts.  People tend to worry about many aspects of their daily lives such as school, work, family, etc.  From my recent experience, my advice would be to focus more on whatever your current situation is and less on worrying about things off into the distance.  I know this may be easier said than done but I am trying to use this approach as much as I can.  I am beginning with something simple like running my first 5k and hopefully will use this to become more present the different aspects of my life.