How to Eat an Elephant
My client comes into my office,
sits down and promptly bursts into tears, “I can’t do it! It’s too hard! I don’t even know where to begin!”
I am sure you have felt the
same way – maybe even said these very words. Recovery from an eating-disorder
can feel overwhelming! Your recovery may
at times feel so insurmountable that you feel defeated and completely unable to
make any progress at all. It may feel
so big it would be like trying to swallow a whole elephant.
So how do you recover? How do you swallow an elephant? One
bite at a time!
What is the first ‘bite’? Where do you start swallowing the
elephant? It doesn’t matter, start
anywhere!
When we get overwhelmed and discouraged
we get paralyzed. Nothing feels like it
would be good enough. Since we don’t
know what would be the perfect place to start, we don’t start at all. This causes us to feel more overwhelmed,
discouraged and anxious – and we turn back to our symptoms and behaviors to
make those feelings go away.
Instead we need to break the problem
down into small ‘bites’ – and it really doesn’t matter what we pick to do first
– we need to just pick something that is achievable. What small ‘bite’ feels like you would be
able to do it? Our inner critic may say, “Just stop! Just eat normally.” If we are bingeing several times a day that
would not be do-able. If we say, “I am
going to eat, and keep, breakfast before I see my therapist” – that may be
do-able.
Once we do that, we have made
progress. A tiny bit of progress leads
to another ‘bite’ and then another. Pretty soon the ‘bites’ join together and we
can see pockets of progress. We may notice after a while that eating and
keeping breakfast is just a part of our routine!
Also we do not have to do this
alone! Reaching out for support -
whether in a support group, a therapy group, a positive relative or friend, or
your therapist – is a big ‘bite’ of progress.
What one small ‘bite’ feels
do-able to you at this point in your recovery?
Once you decide what that one ‘bite’ is tell someone safe – because making
a commitment often helps us be honest with ourselves, and keeps us
accountable. And if we are struggling,
we know that we can reach out to that person to help us.
Hang in there – you can do
this, one ‘bite’ at a time!
Namastè,
Amy Grabowski
Amy Grabowski, MA, LCPC is the
Director and Founder of The Awakening Center. She is in the final editing phase of her
upcoming book about recovery from eating-disorders. You can reach her at (773) 929-6262 x11.
ps - Amy has great respect for elephants as does not advocate eating one! ;o)
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