Hunger Cues: Katie Davis

Are You Hungry?

One approach I teach when working clients at The Awakening Center is Intuitive (or Mindful) Eating. Intuitive eaters eat when they are hungry and stop when they feel satisfied. We all had the ability to do this as babies. Have you ever tried to take food from a baby or small child who is still hungry? It’s not pretty! Unfortunately, as we grow older, many of us lose the ability to not only recognize but - more importantly - to trust our body’s cues of hunger and fullness. The good news is that this skill can be re-learned, leading to a comfortable and healthy long-term relationship with food.

One common struggle in the process toward becoming an intuitive eater is recognizing when the body is signaling hunger. Many clients incorrectly believe that they should only respond to stomach growling. In fact, the body gives us many signals that it is time to eat…and oftentimes stomach growling is the very last cue.

The next time you are trying to determine whether or not you are hungry, look for these physical cues or signals. This is your body saying “I need more energy!”

•  Headache: Note - try to drink 1 cup of water and wait 15 min in case you are in fact dehydrated. If headache persists, it is time to eat.
• Fatigue/lack of energy: A particularly good hunger cue if it has been >3-4 hours since you last ate
• Dizziness: When sitting or upon standing
• Problems concentrating on a task or focusing on a conversation
• Nausea: Often occurs when other hunger cues have been ignored and extreme hunger has set in
• Stomach growling or hunger pains: Clearly it’s time to eat!

Many of these signals (i.e. headaches, dizziness, etc.) originate in the brain because the brain gets priority when it comes to energy supply. Plus the brain runs 95% on energy from glucose, which is mainly derived from carbohydrate intake. So it is not surprising that if hunger is ignored for too long, oftentimes cravings for high-carbohydrate foods set in. High-carbohydrate food are quick, easy source of glucose. Your brain is smarter than you think!

Some clients claim they can go for hours during the day and feel no hunger at all. Keep in mind that caffeine, stress and focusing on an important task can all affect our ability to “hear” our body signaling us. To better listen, make an effort to stop what you are doing every few hours and become aware of your body and any signals that might be present. Take a few deep breaths or go for a quick mindful walk. You may find that you were in fact hungry all along, but simply forgot to listen.

Katie Davis, MS, RD, CSSD, LDN offers both individual and group nutrition counseling at The Awakening Center. For more info call Katie at (773) 929-6262  x24.

Pick Yourself Up, Dust Yourself Off, Start All Over Again

Pick Yourself Up, Dust Yourself Off, Start All Over Again

"Nothing's impossible I have found, for when my chin is on the ground, I pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again" (Lyrics by: Dorothy Fields / Music by: Jerome Kern).

On the path to recovery, to a greater understanding of oneself, or even just an improved outlook – it can be tempting to beat oneself up whenever life throws a curveball and a moment or a day or a week occurs that makes you feel like you have messed it all up.  It can sometimes feel like you have to press the reset button on all of your progress, and that nothing you accomplished before that difficult moment counts anymore.  I know I have struggled with this concept.  I felt that if my recovery or my plans for self-improvement weren’t just perfect, that I either wasn’t doing it right or I was just a failure.  I was living in this black and white world where there wasn’t room for progress, only “perfection”.  Then one day I was introduced to two concepts that actually made me pause and reflect on how I was approaching my life.  I was told that I couldn’t push the river, it was simply going to flow as it needed to.  I was also told that if I did find my “chin on the ground”, to be a gentle cop; meaning to acknowledge that perhaps I had experienced something difficult, and perhaps didn’t make the best decision in the moment, but that I didn’t have to beat myself up so badly that I couldn’t even get up again.  I could love myself, understand that I’m human, and just get back up again and continue down my path.  As I adopted these thought patterns and practiced them, I found that I did indeed become more gentle with myself, and over time I actually stopped perceiving myself to be on the ground so much.  It just felt like life, and I was walking down my path with a greater feeling of Self-love and Self-acceptance.  If you find yourself in a moment with your chin on the ground, perhaps you can practice pausing, remembering you can’t push that river of Life, and gently remind yourself that it’s OK, you’ve still accomplished so much, and you are experiencing your journey and your recovery exactly the right way for you.  You don’t even have to start all over again – you simply pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep moving onward.  

Falling Apart: Erin Diedling

Falling Apart

By: Erin Diedling

Falling Apart, Coming Unglued, Becoming Unraveled…It’s Good Stuff. No. really.

The idea of it sends most people running, saying uncle or plugging their ears. But it is also an act of being. An act of bravery. I speak from the front lines.

I have the great privilege to work with the brave clients who seek help in dealing with a binge-purge cycle, ADHD, OCD or the myriad other smart ways their nervous systems attempt to right the proverbial ship. I find that these clients use these tactics because they are simply looking for a way to defend against what may feel like a greater emotional pain. It’s actually quite intelligent of the body and psyche to defend against what feels scary and overwhelming. They may fear that if they don’t defend against the overwhelm, they may fall apart. But don’t underestimate the power of coming unglued…the genius of falling apart.

This is usually the difference between a client who goes away to treatment and a client who tolerates the suffering so as not to go away to treatment. That’s what treatment centers are FOR – for clients to fall apart and to have multiple safety nets in place as they do fall to pieces. It is the grateful kind of falling to pieces.

Most of the work I do in a private practice setting, while working with trauma, eating disorders and blocked artists/creatives has to do with controlled little-falling-aparts. Clients keep it together during the week and then come the weekly appointment, in a safe incubator they fall apart a tiny bit in session, do some psychoeducation, and get back on the road of day-to-day life armed with new tools and skills.

In our offices, at The Awakening Center, in a quiet, non-shaming and safe way, we hold a space for clients to gently sink into and feel those emotions. We invite them to sense inside and find a voice, an image, a color, a sense, an expression for that small quiet or scared part to speak up, to be scared, and to get the comfort – to FEEL the comfort and finally get what she needed, even if it is 20 or 30 years after the scary, annoying or triggering incident.

Sometimes it is in the falling apart that the true self can come forth. In allowing ourselves space, time and permission to fall apart, we allow things to ultimately fall INTO place.

I recently had an experience going into what I affectionately call, “the dark night of the soul”. And I don’t say that lightly. It was some of the most difficult, albeit intentional, raw space I’ve ever handled. It is my job to keep others safe. To keep it together. To be a healing force for the mental health of my clients and to forge greater awareness of trauma treatment in the world.

And yet, at the core of me, I knew I needed to fall apart. So I did. I gave myself time, space, permission and the required ethical time away from client work to go through whatever it was that would get me where I knew I needed to go. I craved greater self love. I craved putting my emotions as a priority. I wanted to KNOW what interested me. But I grew up in an environment which put all that on the back burner. There was always a fire to put out, there was always chaos or oppression to dodge.

I see this in my clients. When kids grow up in that kind of home and I ask them as adults what they prefer, what they like, what they desire, I’m often met with silence and a faraway stare. This is a new question to a client who grew up in chaos and/or trauma. If we’re lucky, we’ll actually have time to explore those preferences in therapy. They may have habits, ways to regulate the nervous system, ways to stay safe via ADHD, OCD, restricting or binging and purging, etc, etc. Habits to stay safe are one thing. But when you ask them what they WANT, what is fun, what is worth it, what is desirable, what makes them tick????? Well, that is a whole other ballgame.

Counselors often attract the kind of client they are or the kind of client who has been through what the counselor has been through. Hopefully, a good and ethical counselor will continuously do the internal work so that she can be a wise and experienced resource to her clients. That experience can only add to the compassion within the therapeutic alliance.

My compassion has increased as I see clients who are looking at the potential for unraveling. I let them know that it doesn’t have to happen all at once. That they have their answers inside. That finding the answer may involve some falling apart. It may also involve some joy.

For me, in the process of falling apart, I trusted in the universe and I trusted that the child inside could and would get the support she needed. I joyfully sank into the trust of the universe. And interestingly, the universe delivered. Gratefully, colleagues, healers, friends, even strangers showed up for me in such unusual places. I got everything I needed and more. And my heart is broken open, inviting, but protected and radiating trust. This is all new.

So, you say you’re afraid of falling apart? It’s pure genius. Go for it!

Slowing Down and Being Present: Deandra Christianson, Intern

Slowing Down and Being Present

By: Deandra Christianson

Lately, I have noticed, more than usual, the hustle and bustle of our daily lives. Everyone is in a hurry, has somewhere to be, a cell phone attached to one hand, and coffee in the other. People are honking if the person in front of them doesn’t move his or her foot from the break to the gas pedal fast enough after the light turns green. Everyone must constantly “go, go, go!” Now add to the mix cell phones, texting, e-mails, Internet, and computers, and we truly can be reached almost anytime, anywhere.

Personally, this all gets to be a lot. I have started challenging myself to live in the moment and notice the experiences around and inside of me more frequently. Taking a deep breath can bring me to a place of awareness, but sometimes it takes a little more work. This usually happens when I am stressed out or overwhelmed by all that needs to be done. In those times, it feels as if all I can think about is the daunting “TO DO” list. When this occurs, I go through my senses and try to pay attention to what each one is experiencing in that particular moment.

When I practice being in the moment, I am brought to a place of gratitude. I am better able to see all of the wonder and beauty around me. Being in the moment helps me forgive and move on from the past and to not worry about what is to come.

And of course, after these moments, my “TO DO” list is always there waiting for me, and the constant “go, go, go!” goes back to normal. 

Different Points of View

Different Point of View
Courtney Morris

 Through my own experience and simple observation, I have recently become aware of the importance of opening oneself up to others' perspectives.  It seems that too often we get caught up in our own lives, which of course is easy to do, and fail to notice (or even try to imagine) what life may be like for others.  When we allow ourselves to "walk a mile in someone else's shoes" (please forgive the cliche), we are opening ourselves up to new experiences and opportunities to gain new insights in which we may not have otherwise. 

    Lately I have tried doing this myself, simply as an experiment.  Whether in a conversation with a friend or family member, or even during a discussion at school or work, I have found the experience to be not only eye-opening but also quite beneficial for the relationship on both ends.  I tried this without telling anyone what I was doing, but it may be helpful to tell a friend what you are doing, if you think he or she could benefit as well: "I've been finding it really helpful to look at life from different perspectives lately."...
    I also found some simple ways to incorporate this into my life.  First, I simply started asking myself some basic questions, such as "what might this situation be like for (so and so) based on his or her background/personality, etc."? or "how might (so and so)'s experience be impacting how they are reacting to what I'm saying right now?".
    In learning to live more open-mindedly with an appreciation for others' perspectives, we can all grow and hopefully become more understanding people

Stress and Coping:Cara Chill

Stress and Coping

Cara Chill

As a senior in college, I often refer to my life as a balancing act.  It is up to me to maintain good grades while applying to graduate programs, doing research, volunteering, and interning.  As much as I love staying busy, it sometimes becomes overwhelmingly stressful.  I am sure most individuals also have this contradicting life style of trying to keep busy without becoming overloaded.  Personally, I feel stress in small increments can be beneficial, it gives us a reason to get out of bed our start our day.  However, chronic stress can be detrimental to our well-being and may cause physical, emotional, and psychological harm. 

There have been many times in my life where I have felt unsure on how to cope with stress and after years of experimenting, I found working out.  Working out had always been something I incorporated into my life but I never looked at it as a way to manage my stress.  I usually looked at working out as a way to be healthy and keep myself fit but today, it is a simple way for me to deal with stress.  Exercising not only gives me time to think about things in my life, it also ironically, provides a momentary escape from reality and allows me to work on the parts of myself that need some TLC. For me, the best feeling I could give myself is a nice workout followed by a shower and a good nights’ sleep.  Whenever I am stressed and do my routine of working out and getting enough sleep, I wake up feeling refreshed and prepared to start my day. Exercising is also beneficial because it releases endorphins which make you feel good that may also help when dealing with stress. 

            I understand that exercising may require time and planning which not everyone can dedicate to.  Also, some people would rather cope with their stress in a different way other than by working out. In that case, there are many other things that have been found to help decrease stress and some take little to no time at all!

1.      Laugh- it is so simple and you will have fun doing it.  Laughter reduces tension and improves blood flow to the heart.  So when stressed, spend some time with a friend or rent a funny movie and forget about your worries.

2.      Write/ keep a journal- it is also great to record your thoughts and feelings and writing your troubles down can be soothing and also a great way to release tension and look at the situation from a different perspective.

3.      Spend time with those you love- spending time in a place you feel relaxed with those you love provides you with a sense of comfort gives you a sense of belonging and purpose.

4.      Meditate- when you feel tension take some time and take deep breathes.  This can be calming and bring you solace.

5.      Be thankful- there is always something or someone to be thankful for and sometimes we tend to focus on the negative things in our lives instead of all the wonderful things.  It is always refreshing to remember all the positive things in our lives. 

Negative Core Beliefs and Black-and-White Thinking

Negative Core Beliefs and Black-and-White Thinking

As you know, for a long, long time, I’ve been writing a book about Recovery from Eating Disorders – and finally I am in the process of doing the final “hard edit.”  This means that many good sections of the book are being cut.  I’ve been saving these sections in a file I call, “Good Stuff That’s Been Cut From The Book.”  

So I’ve decided to share these sections with you via our Blog.  This one is about Negative Core Beliefs and Black-and-White Thinking.  FYI - The Bully and the Outcast are two of your ‘Parts’ in their negative extreme roles.

Namastè,

Amy Grabowski

…Like the Bully, the Outcast also has distorted thoughts that reinforce negative Core Beliefs.  Black-or-white thinking is common, “There are good people and bad people.  If I do something bad, I am a bad person.” 

Black-or-White thinking can be tricky, sometimes it’s not directly stated, it’s merely implied.  We need to dig a bit to reveal the Black-or-White thought distortion.  When your Outcast thinks, “I’m not lovable,” it implies that you, the whole person, do not possess one lovable quality and not one person in the entire world finds you lovable. 

When my clients say, “Nobody likes me,” I respond in a warm but teasing tone, “Wow!  Even all the people in Asia?!  I didn’t even know that they all knew you!”  Usually the next response will be more realistic, “Well, no one at my office likes me.”  But not to concede to the distortion in even that thought, I question, “No one?  Not even one?” 

At this point I’ll get one of two responses, a realistic response or another distortion.  A realistic response would be, “Yeah, I’ve got a few friends at the office.  But the office manager, Joyce, acts like she doesn’t like me.”  At this point I will ask, “How does that statement feel compared to when you said nobody likes you?”  Usually it feels much more manageable, something we can work on, something we can fix.

More often than not, instead of a realistic response, my question will elicit a very insistent distortion, “But it feels like no one likes me.”  In his book, Feeling Good, David Burns calls this Emotional Reasoning - believing something to be a fact merely because it feels like it is true, even if there is evidence to the contrary: “If I feel it, then it must be true.” 

Emotional reasoning is based on our Core Belief System.  For example, if most people at work show signs of liking you: they smile at you, and show interest in your weekend activities, this would clash with your Core Belief that you are not likeable.  So, you get rid of the evidence, “They don’t really mean it.  They just feel sorry for me.  They must want something from me.  You can’t trust others.” 

Sometimes the Outcast may even invent evidence to support her Core Beliefs.  For example, if you believe you are boring, every time someone glances away while you are speaking, the Outcast may think, “See, I was right.  They are bored with what I am saying.  I am boring.”… 

Amy Grabowski, MA, LCPC is the director and founder of The Awakening Center.  She hopes that her book will be accepted for publication this year!!! You may contact her at awakeningcenter@aol.com or (773) 929-6262 x11.