How Nature Can Remind Us to Be Present

Bryce Canyon, Utah. Photo courtesy of Kimberly Buikema

By Kimberly Buikema

“I only went out for a walk, and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in.” – John Muir, early advocate for US wilderness preservation

Throughout 2016, the National Park Service has celebrated its centennial anniversary, with its actual 100th birthday having taken place on August 25. Anyone who has been lucky enough to visit any of the national parks can attest to their overwhelming beauty and majesty. Visiting them, whether for a few photographs, a brief stroll, a hike, or camping can invoke a sense of awe, wonderment, and peace.

So what is it about that experience that makes it so special? There are most likely scientific studies out there that explain the benefit of getting back in touch with nature and the earth. Instead, I’d like to mention why visiting the national parks have been so special for me.

• The parks remind us that we, as humans are all connected, both to each other and the grander universe. 
• Fresh air and sunshine can work wonders for mental and physical well-being.
• The views are simply awe-inspiring and humbling.
• The quiet and solitude, while being surrounded by beauty, reminds me that I am OK just as I am. 
• The only distraction is nature and abundant life as seen in vegetation and wildlife. I never even look at my phone (unless it’s to take a picture).

I’m seeing new things and views I don’t usually see in the city. The colors are so different and vibrant.

Here in Chicago, we aren’t close to The West where national parks, mountains, deserts, and canyons are abundant. So what can we do here, among the high-rises, sprawling suburbs, and expressways do to feel closer to nature?

• Don’t be afraid to get outdoors! Chicago can be hot and muggy (or REALLY cold) but can you spare a few mindful moments to feel the air on your skin, the earth beneath your feet? Even if the weather is uncomfortable, can you incorporate that into your experience? Can you feel the sweat collecting, the heavy humidity on your skin? 
• Take a moment to listen. What sounds do you hear? Is there wind rustling leaves in the trees? Dogs barking? Birds chirping? Cicadas?
• Open up the windows when the weather allows it. Let natural, fresh air fill your home. Notice how your home smells, feels, or sounds different with the windows open. 
• Take a moment to admire the sky. We have our fair share of lovely sunsets, not to mention clouds, thunderstorms, and stars. 
• Take your meditation or yoga practice outside. 

       Although these ideas seem simple, simplicity is often involved in practicing mindfulness. It allows us a moment to pause, breathe, notice, and connect. Connecting back to nature and the earth can help us feel connected to others and our inner selves.

“Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature’s peace will flow into you as sunshine into trees.” – John Muir

Kim Buikema is a graduate intern at The Awakening Center. She is currently in her second and final year in the Clinical Mental Health Counseling program at Northeastern Illinois University in Chicago. She believes that goodness and truth lives within everyone and hopes to help people find their own inner-truth and goodness through counseling. She has a regular yoga and meditation practice, and enjoys traveling and music. She has recently returned to Chicago after living in the UK for ten years.

Peacefully Present For Today

Often when the New Year rolls around we get excited about what we want to be different this next year. We generally commit to the same goals that inherently we know will make our lives better and bring us closer to being fulfilled. The problem is that as the days and weeks go by we often return back to our patterns and habits. I think perhaps we get distracted by thinking that completing or arriving at our goals is what will bring us contentment. However, must we really wait that long?

I have been reminded this year that it isn’t necessarily the realization of an aspiration that brings us the change in how our life feels but the way we approach it. We all have goals in our lives that are going to take some time, some patience and perhaps some divine blessing. I think the challenge is to think about how we can certainly be committed to our efforts connected to these achievements but also knowing when we need to be still and patient. Rather than longing for things that perhaps aren’t meant for us now we can focus on the present. We can be aware of all the gifts of today. The blessings in our lives now that we are meant to enjoy, be challenged by and perhaps are preparing us for the goals to be reached in the future. Approaching our lives in this way eliminates all the anxiety and stress we create by trying to force life along. It allows us to be more mindful of what is intended for us today, how that is preparing us for tomorrow and allowing us to grow in ways that prime us for when the time comes for all that we desire.

Jen

Jen Schurman, MA, LPC, is a therapist at The Awakening Center and leads the Monday Eating Disorder Therapy Group from 6:30-8pm, which currently has openings. Jen can be reached at (773)-929-6262 x 20 for more information regarding this group.

True Friendship

Here in Chicago, with our bone chilling winters, we cherish our warm Summer weather as much as possible. Summer is a great time to get together with friends - going to the beach, listening to music at an outdoor concert, playing in a park.
But Life is not always rosy, and friends can be the lifeline we cling to when "Life gives us lemons....." The following blog article "True Friendship" is written by Dr Gulin Guneri. The picture is of Gulin with her good friend Victoria on Gulin's first 4th of July as an American Citizen! Congratulations, Gulin!

Namasté,

Amy

True Friendship

A true friend has your back. They accept the real you with all your quirkiness and insecurities. When you are hard on yourself because you thought you made the “worst mistake in your life” they are right there beside you. They are either a phone call or a cab drive away. After a heart to heart conversation, a true friend reminds you to be kind to yourself. They help you to put things in perspective – your “mistakes” are only part of the learning process that allows you to become a better person. They help you to forgive yourself for not being perfect.

A true friend does not allow you to dwell on the past and replay the scenarios over and over again in your head with “I could have done this!” or “I shouldn’t have said that!” A true friend reminds you that the past is in the past and has no power over you in the now! They help you to focus on the present time so that you can take charge of your life again.

A true friend reminds you that you are not the victim, but you are the conductor who orchestrates your life events. They facilitate the process of finding your inner wisdom as they listen to you calmly, non-judgmentally and with loving care. Because of their existence in your life, you strive to become a better person. A true friend reminds you that the path to happiness and tranquility starts with becoming forgiving, loving, gentle and kind to yourself. And you come to that realization that as you forgive yourself, it becomes easier to forgive others.

If you are having a bad day, pick up the phone and call your true friend. Nobody is a mind reader. If you don’t reach out, your true friend will not know that you needed them in that moment. After a heart to heart conversation on the phone or getting together for a cup of coffee, you do feel relieved as you free yourself from your “punitive self” – the one that judges you for what you have done in the past or agonizes you for “all the bad things” that “can happen” in the future. Do not hesitate to pick up the phone and reach out to your true friend. They will never think that you are a “burden” to them.

In the end, they are your true friend because you reciprocate the loving kindness and respect and care for them. Your true friend is in your life because they also learn from you as you also help them to be in touch with their inner wisdom. They are your true friend because they already know that you got their back!


Gulin Guneri, PsyD
(773) 929-6262 x18

"Pause"

"Pause"

Jolene Hwee, a Practicum Student from Northwestern University, has written the next blog article called “Pause”. Her article reminds me that we live in such a busy world that we don’t often take the time to “Pause” and take care of ourselves for all the little things we need to do, but also all the little things that we know we should do. But it is in those little “Pauses” that can change our lives. October is Breast Cancer awareness month. I encourage all of you, both women and men, to “Pause” and check your breasts. While 80% of all breast lumps are benign, it is with early detection that Breast Cancer is most beatable.

My niece Morgen Paul is doing the AvonWalk for Breast Cancer in Washington DC in memory of my sister Terri who died in 2003 after a courageous 10 year battle. If you would like to help find a cure for Breast Cancer, please consider donating to a member of her team: “Terri’s TaTa’s”. Click on this link: AvonWalk for Breast Cancer: Terri's TaTa's

Namasté,
Amy Grabowski

“Pause”

This summer I became a mother.

My life changed in every way possible. I was thrust from a world of books and clinical training to one filled with diaper changes, burp cloths and 3am feeds. Overnight, I became severely sleep deprived, physically exhausted and mentally overwhelmed. I was suddenly responsible for a tiny human being who was dependent on me for her every need, and although this responsibility was often a joy, it also filled me with wordless anxiety.

Maybe you have also experienced a change in your life- the loss of a friend, a new job, moving cities, marriage, graduation, a change that fills you with a kind of suffocating, racing anxiety that you can’t get away from. Maybe you experience sleepless nights, hectic days, and a constant wondering “How can I stop feeling so anxious? When will I ever stop worrying?”

I have found that it is precisely during these intense, anxiety-filled days that being mindful is necessary, but oh so difficult.

Mindfulness is “awareness without judgment of what is, via direct and immediate experience” (Cindy Sanderson, PhD). You are being mindful when you listen to a song and experience every note, when you make some tea and take time to smell its aroma, when you dance without self-consciousness and when you notice the colors of the sky during sunset.

Mindfulness is meeting every moment of life in the present, with complete awareness, and suspending our judgments, whether positive or negative. Unfortunately, the world we live in does not encourage mindfulness; we are expected to be multi-taskers, to do two or three or four things all at the same time. Most of us have two or more pressing responsibilities, work, school, family, friends, that constantly demand our attention. We admonish ourselves for not doing what we ‘should’ and doing what we ‘should not’. We often spend our time planning the future or ruminating about the past, rarely appreciating the present. We move through life with breakneck speed, asking, “What’s next?” instead of savoring what is now.

When anxiety overtakes us, the ‘shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’ may seem even louder. They can easily drown out our sense of self, rock our sense of equilibrium and steal whatever sense of peace we may feel. It becomes easier is do things on auto-pilot, to stomp through life, to hastily tick things off our lists, and hope that somehow, someday, that anxiety will go away.

But will it?

This is what I want to suggest; instead of hitting the fast-forward button, why don’t we try to hit pause.

Pause, and breathe. Pause, and feel. Pause, and savor.

Maybe, just maybe, if we slow down and take the time to live in this present moment, life and all its demands will be that much more manageable.

For me, being mindful is learning to be with my daughter without thinking about my work; and to be at work without worrying about my daughter.

What does being mindful mean to you?

Jolene Hwee

"Delighting in Fall"

Besides Psychotherapy, another passion of mine is astronomy! We just experienced the Autumnal Equinox – the day when the Sun crosses the equator and the day and night are equal in length. Whenever we experience an astronomical event, I think about early humans. I wonder what they were thinking when the sun was lower in the sky and the days were shorter. Were they frightened of the changes they couldn’t understand? Even modern humans have fears of change, especially of the unknown. Jen Schurman helps clients explore the dynamics that lead to a greater sense of self-awareness. You’ll hear this self-awareness in her Blog article as she “notices” the changing seasons.

Namasté,

Amy Grabowski, MA, LCPC

“Delighting in the Fall”

I’m a summer girl. I love the lake, the sand, the sun, the warm weather and flip flops. So I got to thinking as I found myself ignoring the signs that fall is surely on its way. What is it about the change in this season that is so difficult? Surely there is something nice about the changing colors on the trees, a brisk breeze while on a walk, apple cider and even football games. But appreciating the fall means letting go of all I love about the summer and looking forward to what lies ahead. The changing seasons is a reminder of the endless changes that we face in our lives.

I often encourage clients to think about changes in their lives. We talk about preparing for change, observing change, and even delighting in change. But it often takes quite some time before the process of change actually begins. So often we say things like, “But I’m comfortable here,” or “I can’t wait for this part of my life to just be over so I can get where I want to be” or “It’s impossible to make sense of what this time is really for.” Although the season ahead may be what we truly desire, many things are required to be left behind. In order to savor the present season we need to leave the comfort, safety, and familiarity of the previous season behind. No wonder it’s difficult to get moving. The shifting from one season to the next requires a belief that the coming season has exciting, fulfilling, challenging, and new purposes for us.

The movement from one season to the next dares us to let go of the old and welcome the new. It challenges us to trust that regardless of where we are in life or what situations may be happening, there is something essential for us about this time. Savoring each season involves us being in the present moment and not living for yesterday or tomorrow but right now. I know that when I remind myself to be mindful and pay attention there are so many things I notice that typically get overlooked. I notice a child’s carefree laughter, I notice the stranger that just gave me a warm smile, I notice how difficult the moment is and that I’m actually getting through it, I notice what I love about this time in my life, I notice what I need…I notice. So often all of these little moments in life get disregarded and we feel like we are just rushing through the days.

The challenge of being present for each season in our lives does not discount the fact that there are some that are more pleasant than others. There are seasons we will look back on with lovely memories and seasons we will long to put behind us. The importance is being able to fall away from the safety of the last season and eagerly anticipate what lies ahead, for this is how we truly grow. There is a great transformation that occurs in our lives as we realize that regardless of the season we can handle it. That in each season there is something intended for us, something for us to know, learn, challenge or even a joy to simply revel in. In each and every season we have the gift of the strength within us.

So as I pack my beach bag and flip flops I am challenging myself to enjoy the bright red hues of the changing leaves and get comfortable in my favorite sweater. I know that although it can be difficult to move from a season I love, surely the one to come has much potential and promise. Perhaps Ralph Waldo Emerson says it best, “What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside you.”

Jen Schurman, MA, LPC

(773) 929-6262 x 20